Love, loss and pain...

February 7, 2012

I'm writing this today because I know I'm going to forget this.

I was talking to my hairdresser earlier about how much things have changed in the last 18 months. Good changes, bad changes, but a lot of changes. You know, life.

This got me thinking about the changes that have been the hardest to deal with. Those of the loss of something or someone I really cared about. At the time of any loss...expected or unexpected...there is some level of pain and discomfort. In those moments...I felt like my life was over. A minute took an hour. A day took a year. Funny...in the worst of times...time passes so slowly. In everyday life...time is a blur.

But in reality...my life was not over. Just changed by the experience of knowing someone, caring about them, and feeling the loss of losing them.

What I want to remember from today...is that when a loss occurs my life is continuing. It will be different..but it's up to me to make it a good life. I should not let the pain consume me, cause me stress, and minimize the potential my life can be.

Everything has a beginning, a middle and an ending. Every person, every relationship, every job...everything ends. Most of the time, things do not end on our terms. And...I think it's best this way. The shock of an ending is devastating...but knowing everything will end should add some comfort. The pain is a natural part of life.

I write this today because, like I said, I am sure to forget this point. There are quite a few people that I care deeply for that would cause me much pain if I lost. However...knowing that I was able to care for someone so much that the pain of losing them would be excruciating is a blessing more than a curse. How wonderful is it to say you loved someone that much?

May everyone spend time enjoying your beginnings and your middles...and try to move past your ends quickly.